Haymitch's life, lost and love
by NightThinker
Summary: NEW AND IMPROVED! Want to know what goes on in Haymitch's head? and love him as much as I do? Then please give it a read. it's all about his life after the games and what made him what he is. The plot is open to go in any direction and please give your opinions on what you would like, so really its our story. thanks guys!


Haymitch's life, lost and love

hi guys this is my first ever Fan fiction so I thought I would do it on Haymitch sorry if he's a bit out of character, but I tried to show a new perspective on my favourite hunger games character. this story is about his life after his games and might progress into a love story, really this is a little intro into his feelings after the games.

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Of course I don't own any of the hunger games characters and they all belong to the amazing Suzanne Collins etc.

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Chapter 1-sinking Spirits

_Greeted by the smell of sweat and alcohol I plonk down in an old armchair, my glass refilled I start to think, oh shit this never ends well..._

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It was a dreary morning in victor's village, considering haymitch was the only victor there, what was the point in going outside. It has been only a couple of years since his 'glorious' win in the 50th hunger games, only he wished that stupid piece of paper stayed in the bottom of the glass bowl but tesserae was more important. Only there are mouths to feed anymore. He has all the money he needs, but not surprisingly doesn't have the appetite.

Haymitch is sat half-conscious on his stinking couch in his disgustingly filthy house, it didn't even take a year to get in this state, he likes it messy and it stays that way, it's one thing he can count on to not have changed, its home. Some cleaners from the capitol tried to clean it let's just say one came back with a black eye and a new understanding of sign language. He is slowly awaking to the dim light of morning, he hates mornings it reminds him that he's got a whole day left. Which reminds him, he's out of liquor and that is extremely bad for him and everyone else. You see it's the only way the numb the pain.

Haymitch's pov

God how did my life get to me being a drunk at such a young age with everyone hating my guts,

You see none of them understand, I know I never was a likeable kid but you have to be tough if you're a seam kid, you have to put a brave face on for the sake of your family and after the reaping they were relying on me, huh look where that got them. Today I'm out of booze and the images are flooding back, Maysilee dying in my arms, getting back to receive word that my whole family were killed for my actions, the faces of last year's tributes bleeding out to death in the arena. Yeah now you want to judge why I drink? Thought not.

It takes me half an hour to get down to the hob and buy the usual clear spirits off ripper, people still stare are district 12s victor and lost cause. I trudge back to the village although to me it looks more like a camp for the capitol to keep me in, and I oblige them. Greeted by the smell of sweat and alcohol I plonk down in an old armchair, my glass refilled I start to think, oh shit this never ends well.

I see her face, all their faces but they aren't the same people, there expressions are hardened and her eyes, especially her eyes are black with rage. She can pierce through me with her look I know she blames me, it was my fault.

"Haymitch, I thought you loved me? Why are you not here, you wanted me to die didn't you? So you could win, in fact did you ever care for me or love me?"

Maysilee, I know this isn't real but she was so innocent, why does she torture me, why didn't I die instead. The visions are getting worse she is sanding in a pool of blood surrounded by my family,

"who knows Haymitch maybe I didn't love you either, actually I'm glad I died there, I didn't want my family to suffer. Look what good winning did to yours," she is speaking in a quiet tone but it is cutting through me like a knife.

"DO YOU FEEL GUILTY HAYMITCH ABERNATHY!"

Of course I love you! I t was my fault you died; I am reminded every day of the moment I saw your beautiful eyes go cloudy as you left me! Yes my family died because of me; yes I would take your place to keep them safe! Yes I am guilty.

They torture me for hours; I have my hands over my ears trying to cover the voice of my love telling me what I already know. I can't take this she is right it was my fault if I had ducked down I would have done them a favour. I am not the same person now, there's no point standing up to or fighting the demons that you can never escape, there's just a way of leaving them for one that's willing to take me. Who knows maybe I can be reunited with the loves of my life and I hope that the darkness has faded from her eyes, oh what I'd give to see them eyes. I'd give my life that's what I owe her and them anyway, my blood for theirs it's only fair.

I grab a tie meant for the reaping in a month and do the right thing; I slip silently from the chair in the kitchen and let the ceilings beams carry me away from this hell. I wait for deaths cold embrace to take me as I feel the tie tighten around my throat where the alcohol still burns. I can't wait to leave to go somewhere that can't be as bad, in fact I'm wondering if this won't kill me and if I'm actually in hell now and there will be no ending to my suffering that even death will not have me.

It seems I was correct as I awake the next day in a sickly pure white room with tubes pumping out my body, seems twelve needs a mentor considering the other one just died. Oh lucky me can't go disappointing Effie now can I, oh sorry Effie how selfish of me to try and escape my constant torture and finally become reunited with my family who was murdered in cold blood, how inconsiderate of me. Indeed this is my hell tailored perfectly by president snow to watch all the pain and sadness that happened to me happen to other children, and know that they are better off dead whilst trying to keep them alive. Oh great now I will be able to help two more kids die, I slowly begin to realise this is going to be my job for the rest of my life. They better have some drink on the tributes train, so I can drown it out.

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Few well there we go

I am really interested on your thoughts about this its an open book really, tell me where you wanna take it. It can be a love story, maybe a Hayniss, or we can introduce our own women for him? let me know, oh and please review! if your a Haymitch fan your epic by the way, not trying to win you over it's just the truth.

thank you, Thank you, Thank you,

review, review, review... so we can get this show (or games) on the road! :)

NightThinker :)

Kay

x


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